July 14, 2010

I know I was not going to come back in here and report on anything, as nothing really has changed.  Moving right along with blood tests (white count low so I have to be really careful of infection now) and everything else as well as can be expected.  Am in the hump day of Week 3, as the week progresses I become less anxious and more relaxed anticipating a weekend 'off' so to speak.  It gets grueling going to Minneapolis everyday, not just for me but for Rich although he doesn't complain.  He sits upstairs in the waiting front area, sets up shop and works.  Then I go do my thing and come back upstairs to meet him.  He doesn't have to go to radiation with me or for the weekly catch up check ups.  I have my phone so if something comes up he needs to be privy too that I can't tell him later, I call him and he comes downstairs.  We have a pretty good system going now.  Sad we even have to have a system but we worked it out well.

You meet some interesting people at these hospitals and everyone is friendly because the patients are all there for the same reason and the staff is there to comfort them.  I love the U of M medical facility.  I met one of the schedulers and front desk people (Danny) awhile back.  He smelled really nice so every time I went by I would sniff him.  He thought that was funny.  Bought me a little spray bottle of what he wears so I can sniff when he isn't around.  If it weren't for him I would not have gotten all my paperwork and cd's of the PET scan.  Have met others who have sons and daughters in chemo/radiation. The stories they tell - and not just them but their families where cancer has ravaged not just one generation but three and four and they are all there to talk about it. 

Yesterday when I was returning from my rad and chemo doc visit there was this girl decked out in all tie dyed fabric with a large peace sign necklace.  Her friends reminded me of people I knew in the 60's, laid back hippie types.  All very friendly and warm.  They were there to support her, as she was there with breast cancer and was staying at the local 'hotel' they have for treatment patients since she lived so far away.  She was this alive, excitable, warm human being.  Suffering from more than the breast cancer, she just exuded life, enjoyment, make the best of what you have type of attitude.  I immediately liked her.  She also had a box with dozens of cupcakes for her 'chemo' party.  I was privy to a cupcake and even her napkins were tie dyed with peace symbols.  We chatted for about half an hour and learned about one anothers treatment.  We took a picture together, hugged and a new friend was made.   It wasn't the new friend that impressed me, it was her vibrant attitude.  She kept saying she doesn't sweat the small stuff anymore.  Why bother.  It's just small stuff.  I'm beginning to understand this and find myself not caring anymore about the little things that used to bug me because in the scheme of things, they do not matter.   I suppose I say that out loud now to those of you who read this blog...look around you.  I'm sure there are things in your life that you worry about that really are not important.  What is important is your family, the relationship you have with your spouse and children, your extended family and your friends.  Don't take any of them for granted and appreciate them even with the flaws you might think they have.  Let them know you care.  Hug them a lot. 

Did I mention that Harvey isn't giving me as much trouble lately?  I can sit without feeling like he's trying to get out and bite me.  Either he is hibernating in there or he is shrinking or dying or melting or whatever they do when chemo and rad hits them.  One gal on the chemo site said her doctor said that once the tissue reaches necrosis (dies) it gets absorbed by the body from healthy cells and is then disposed of out of the body from there.  I thought that was interesting although I have not come across anything on that yet...will have to research that.  Meanwhile, I shall end for this week and wish everyone a happy, healthy week and weekend.  Thank you all for being there for me.  I believe this journey is going so much better with all of you accompanying me with your prayers, love and concern.   Be well, Marilyne