Monday, October 4, 2010

October 4, 2010

Hello Everyone - just a short update.  One month from yesterday I will be going for my first three month post treatment scans (MRI and PET-CT) to ascertain if Harvey is gone.  While I remain hopeful and optimistic that he is indeed gone, there is that small mustard seed of doubt in my heart.  Please continue your wonderful prayers and thoughts...they have gotten me this far without much pain and trauma.  Each day I get a tad bit stronger.  Heartbeat is still high if I exert a little bit but I think that is to be expected yet.  After all I'm only starting week 7 from treatment and while I feel like it is 7 months post treatment rather than weeks, I realize I need to be kinder to my body and just appreciate it has gotten me this far. 

I will be back in here probably the week or two before the scans.  While you try to forget you have cancer in between, the scans bring you shockingly back to reality for two weeks out of the three month spans they take.   To that end, I am having a home craft show the weekend of Nov. 5 and 6 to keep my mind off my own scans and subsequent Dr. appts the following week with results.  I have not made any new items but am having 6 other people bring their items over along with mine which alleviates the stress in my making new least for this show.  I enjoy setting up so much that I do not think it will be a hardship on me plus I plan on setting up the displays weeks before the actual show to take my time...

Rich seems to think I am back to my 'old self' because I'm doing  a few more things than before and I admit I've been nagging on him a lot more lately which is probably why he thinks I am back to 'normal.'  I keep telling him there is no back to normal.  Those who have been through this know there is only the 'new normal' and physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally one is never the same.  I personally think life is better because of this, not worse - maybe not for Rich with me nagging him again - but for me it has taken on deeper meaning.  Just being reflective today because a long term friend of mine from NJ has her second scan for lung cancer this Friday and in solidarity, am feeling her anxiety and apprehension.  My prayers and thoughts will focus only on her this week. 

Be well everyone, Marilyne

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