Friday, December 17, 2010

Waiting...

Hello Everyone...back in here for a small update.  Had a biopsy done a few days ago - had colon surgeon visit a few days before that and he scheduled the biopsy.  I asked if harvey had shrunk more and he said yes.  However, when I read his report from November he noted that he would do a biopsy if the tumor remained the same or got larger.  Naturally, I was concerned.  This last visit though, he seemed 'less' concerned but still wanted to do the biopsy.  I base his concern level on his voice and body language and he seemed more relaxed this time.  I asked if it was to confirm or deny cancer was still there and he said yes, that is what it was for.  I also asked him before the biopsy when the results would be in and he said either today or Monday he hoped.  So once again I wait.  My feelings right now are neutral (not optimistic or pessimistic) only because my team has done everything they can for me in this area to rid me of harrvey and God will do for me what He thinks is the best for me. I prayed for healing and I trust that in one way or another that healing will occur. I will be back in here when I hear the results of the biopsy.  Continue your prayers please.  I have no doubt, no doubt whatsoever that your thoughts and prayers got me through treatment with minimal difficulty and now even after treatment continues to attack harvey with gusto.  The saying "Prayer Changes Things" has taken on new meaning for me since this diagnosis.  It truly does.  I'm proof of that.

I've learned a great deal this year with this diagnosis.  I have learned that a diagnosis of cancer is scary but does not have to mean the end of everything.  I have learned that there is a lot of waiting to this disease, a lot of ups and a lot of downs.  Optimism and discouragement can come within five minutes of each other which can play havoc on your mind.   I've been reading many books on the disease (as well as some fun fiction not related to the disease).  "Anti Cancer" is one of the books my forum cohorts recommend and I'm currently reading that.  Facinating book - discusses why some people are more susceptible to cancer than others and how cells grow, etc.   Rich bought me a Kindle as an early Christmas gift so I could download books to read while I was in the aiting rooms for these dr appointments as sometimes we are there for a few hours.  It's good to be busy and reading helps pass that time.  I love my Kindle but I think Rich might be getting annoyed with the charges of my downloading books. :-)  I was able to actually download the Bible for free! 

Christmas is coming up quickly.  I'm trying to catch up wrapping gifts and doing my cards.  Not sure if a letter will come this year but we shall see.  Wishing you all a Blessed and Loving Christmas season...a season of miracles and love and joy - may we all experience them.  Be well always, Marilyne

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